Ghost No More:
by CeeCee James
Ghost No More is a memoir about the journey of joyful living after child abuse.
All CeeCee wanted was just a touch of approval and love from her mother. That's all.
What she got was neglect, homelessness, dirty secrets, and abuse. Yet, there must be a way out of the mind-numbing self-condemnation that would surely lead to her ultimate destruction - there had to be.
All she had to do was find the key that would open the door to feeling loved for the first time, learning to trust, and healing the broken places.
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I started reading this at night in bed and finally put it down at 4:30 am. Not because I was done reading, but because I needed to sleep! And finished the book later in the day. It's not often I stay up all night reading a book, but when I do, it's because it's really good and well written! This is a book about a girl who survives a horribly abusive childhood. But she doesn't just survive, she ends up finding healing, love, and redemption. Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your story, CeeCee. I am in awe that such beauty can come out of incredible pain.
Guest Post from CeeCee James (originally posted on her blog)
What's Next as Adult Survivors of Child Abuse?
So I made this blog for several reasons. I have been doing some healing from past child abuse, and thinking about how we go on to try and live normal healthy lives, hoping to never be like our abusers.
Sometimes I still feel the rejection from my parents, especially since, even as an adult I tried to have relationship with them. I didn't realize the abuse was still going on, through their manipulation and insults. I was still trying to be the "good child". What I thought was healthiness was really my old coping skills kicking in to protect me from their outbursts.
My parents eventually didn't want to speak to me anymore. Even though their rejection hurt, that's when I experienced some real freedom.
So I wondered if there were more of us out there, who struggle between the hurt, and health of a relationship with parents that once abused us (and maybe still do). BTW - Facebook has been a doozy, every time someone posts a picture about "appreciate your mom or dad", I feel pain. Every time someone writes, your parents won't be with you for long, I feel pain. I can't fix the relationship. The separation has to be there for now for my own health.
Sometimes we chose the separation, sometimes we don't. But however it comes I think it helps us to see more clearly. We want to please our family, so it's only when that option isn't available that we can really see things for the way they are.
It's hard to see the estrangement as a consequence of their choices, but it really is. Without even a small change of heart on their part, it's hard to get healthy while still in a relationship with them.
Here is a hug for each and every person who needs one:
We might have been bruised, scared, and broken as kids, but there is a life, and light out of that pain. There is healing for the part of us that we'd rather shut away because we think no one can relate. Here's to living a life of beauty pulled from all those ashes.
From the Author
Hi there! Just want to send out a big thank you to all of my readers!
I love to write, paint with watercolors, and eat chocolate. Not necessarily all at the same time. I love to do pranks too, usually just on my poor husband who luckily puts up with me and lets me think I'm clever. One of my favorite pranks was sewing his work t-shirt neck-hole shut on April Fool's (I made him lasagna that night to make up for it.)
He does a few on me - his last one was hiding an old helium birthday balloon under the covers at night. I had just finished a spooky story, and as the last one awake, I checked the doors and turned off the lights. As I climbed into bed this apparition rose out of the covers, and I screamed ... until I heard him laugh.
I still owe him for that one ... ;)
Again, thank you, and have a great day!
Please visit me at my blog.