Wednesday, February 25, 2015

"Slightly Stalky" by Amy Vansant

Slightly Stalky:
A Romantic Comedy Walks Into a Bar...
(Slightly Book 1)
by Amy Vansant

Amy Vansant, the author of Slightly Stalky, stops by today to share an excerpt from the book. You can also read my review of this laugh-aloud book, and enter our exclusive giveaway in which three people will win their choice of one of Amy's books.

Emily never expected to find love in a dart bar, but the moment she spots tall, sexy Sebastian, she’s determined to catch his eye.
Ex-girlfriends, perpetually shirtless rich boys, frantic best-friends and a mysterious orange handbag converge to stop her.
No one said stalking was easy, but if romance was left to the boys, the human race would die out while they logged fantasy football points and punched each other in the balls.
Everyone knows that.
Emily’s not stalking Sebastian ... she’s saving the world.

Emily brushed her teeth with the guest toothbrush a second time. She fixed the smeared mascara under her eyes and searched for beauty products in the mirrored cabinet. Nothing. Why had she never thought to keep an emergency beauty kit in the spare bathroom? Sneaking into her en suite bathroom would mean more creaking floorboards.
Emily pinched her cheeks to raise their color and then bit at her lip, thinking the same trick might apply. She took a step toward the mirror and accidentally kicked the metal trashcan, which clattered to its side and bounced back and forth like an infernal clock pendulum. The noise was horrendous. Emily dove to stop the can from clanging, and clipped her forehead on the sink as she dipped.
The blow sent Emily arching back in the opposite direction, as if Muhammad Ali had just connected an uppercut to her jaw. Her left hand clutched her throbbing forehead, her right slapped across her mouth to stop herself from howling in surprise and pain. Emily stumbled back from the sink, her heel jamming against the tub, clipping her legs from beneath her. Tumbling backwards, she grabbed for the shower curtain to stop her fall, ripping it from the rod with a jangling succession of snapping clasps, punctuated by the hollow thuds of her elbows and head smacking the shower insert.
Emily lay perpendicular across the tub, covered by the shower curtain and rod, her legs over the edge and dangling just above the floor.
“Emily?” called a voice just outside the door.
Emily lifted her chin and smacked the back of her head into the wall a second time. She realized she was out of breath. Who knew trying not to die in a tragic bathroom accident was fantastic exercise? Funny, she’d never seen that workout video.
Emily noticed blush sitting in the tub beside her. She’d forgotten she’d hidden her beauty products in the tub the night before.
“Emily?” called Sebastian again. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine!” said Emily as cheerily as possible. “I’m sorry I woke you. I…I knocked over something.”
“Uh, ok…”
He sounded dubious. Emily knew, short of pushing a grandfather clock into a pile of china dishes, noises like the one she’d made didn’t exist in nature.
Emily hauled herself out of the tub to the music of clattering plastic clasps. She re-hung the rod and curtain and inspected her head in the mirror. A small egg had already appeared near the hairline of her left temple. She touched it and winced.
She used the makeup in the bathtub to do some rapid maintenance work on both her face and the lump.
Emily righted the trashcan, took one last look in the mirror, and opened the door.
She made her way back to the bedroom to find Sebastian sitting up in bed.
“Decide to do a little home remodeling?” he asked.

Praise for the Book
"The things that Emily goes through, her thoughts and actions made me laugh many times. A fast paced fun laugh out loud romantic comedy not like any other story I have read. Those who love romantic/comedy with a lovable leading lady will enjoy Slightly Stalky: A Romantic Comedy Walks Into a Bar..., I recommend to those who want to curl up with a great, fun book. A pure delight!" ~ Sheri A. Wilkinson
"First let me say - I started reading this while eating lunch at my work desk. I laughed out loud so many times I'm fairly sure my boss knows I wasn't entering invoices. Not to mention choking on my salad. A very light and easy read. Thoroughly enjoyable. I love all sorts of books but one that can make me cackle is the best!" ~ Carrie Bourlier
"Amy Vansant weaves a cute, funny, and very relatable tale about romance in the real world. It may not be perfect, or easily attainable, but getting there is an adventure in itself. An absolute must read and one of my favorites of the year so far." ~ DarlingChristie
"OMG this book was HILARIOUS! I was going to just read a little while I fell asleep and I was laughing so hard I had to get up and finish because my husband couldn't sleep! There were spots that made me cry they were so funny and there were funny bit scattered through the whole book so you never got bored. The characters were more real than a lot of romance books, which was great, because you could really relate to what happened. The super sexy dumb guy made me laugh every time he walked into a room, and the two leads were both funny and likeable. Highly recommend!! Glad it looks like it is going to be a series... I'm going to have to stalk the next book!" ~ Heather Brunell
"I loved this book! Read it in under 24 hours. Funny, fast-paced, smart, rom-com." ~ SSSReviews

My Review

By Lynda Dickson
Emily's friend Kady talks her into going to darts night at the Irish pub in order to meet men. Emily is instantly attracted to Sebastian. Sebastian is also attracted to Emily, but he's stuck in a relationship with the buxom Greta. Emily has a history of being "slightly stalky" in her pursuit of men, and she is no different with Sebastian. As she tries to get closer to him, circumstances always seem to intervene. While Sebastian tries to fight off the desperately clingy Greta, Emily deals with the not-unwelcome advances from the gorgeous but inanely simple Mark. Will Emily and Sebastian ever get their timing right and end up together?
Slightly Stalky is a sweet romance as well as an extremely funny comedy of errors, told from both Emily's and Sebastian's points-of-view. The absurdly comical incidents had me laughing out loud. I especially enjoyed Sebastian's interactions with Greta's insane "blind" dog Binkers, Sebastian's hunt for a place to live, and Emily's dealings with Sebastian's family.
I look forward to reading the next installment in this series.

About the Author
Amy Vansant has been writing and finding other creative ways to make no money since high school.
She is the author of the urban fantasy series Angeli and romantic comedy Slightly Stalky, as well as the editor and one of the 26 authors of the humor anthology Moms are Nuts, which has been on Amazon's best-sellers lists since its publication in April 2014.
Amy the former East Coast Editor of SURFER Magazine and freelance writer. Long ago she wrote The Surfer's Guide to Florida, which is currently out of print because the urge to drive up and down the coast interviewing surfers has long since left her.
Amy is a nerd and Labradoodle mommy.

Enter the giveaway for a chance to win one of three ebooks by Amy Vansant (winner's choice).